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Tapping Into Emotional Resilience

A SIMPLE GESTURE TO ENERGISE THE MIND AND BALANCE YOUR MOOD

Mental Wellbeing 3 Minute Read

In this COMO Conversation, we speak to Joy Yaffe — an expert EFT Tapping practitioner based in COMO Shambhala Metropolitan London. It involves gentle tapping on the body’s acupressure points, which releases negative emotions and stress. Discover how this gesture can build emotional resilience and provide support in disruptive environments.


 

Grounding the nervous system

Joy Yaffe

Joy Yaffe was introduced to EFT Tapping in 2012 by Mark Gerow, Yoga Teacher & Certified Mindfulness Stress Reduction Coach, in Massachusetts. Yaffe completed her 100 hours of EFT Tapping sessions with Betty Moore-Hefter and was certified as an EFT Practitioner. She continued working with clients incorporating Breathwork with EFT Tapping in Milan, Italy. Since moving to London in 2018, Joy continues to use EFT Tapping as a self-help tool.

WHAT IS EFT TAPPING? HOW DID YOU DISCOVER ITS EFFECTS?

EFT Tapping, or the Emotional Freedom Technique, is a therapeutic approach that uses the acupressure points on the body to reduce negative emotions like anxiety and stress. It’s research-backed — tapping has been shown to send calming signals to the brain, allowing us to review and address stressful issues without activating uncomfortable emotions.

I first experienced tapping in the United States. I’d just had surgery, and I was feeling very sluggish and tired all the time. My friend, yoga teacher Mark Gerow, told me to get into the lotus position and he said, “Joy, would you like to try this new technique?” And he demonstrated how to gently tap the acupressure points on the body with two fingers. Within five minutes, I felt completely renewed and regenerated, and full of energy.  

After that experience, I went back to Milan, and started to share it with my community and friends. I worked in the fashion industry, and there were always people that were stressed and overwhelmed. I realised that I wanted to seriously study EFT Tapping and perhaps even do it as a living, to help more people. And so I started my studies under Betty Moore-Hafter in Vermont, completed the course, and became a certified EFT practitioner. 

HOW CAN EFT TAPPING HELP US IN A MODERN WORLD?

Everyone experiences stress, but I’ve noticed that most people do not have a coping mechanism for stress. Whether it’s from a major life change, a breakup, their own self-imposed standards, or work stress — it could be a member of your family who knows how to press your buttons, or when you’re rushing to get out of the house and you put a finger through your cashmere sweater. Everything becomes amplified. 

And it helps us to regulate the balance between good and bad stress. We need some good stress in our lives to get those cortisol levels up, but not too much. When the cortisol levels are too high, that’s when you start to see the health problems come in. Research has shown that chronic stress can actually decrease our lifespan. A 2016 study revealed that EFT Tapping produces positive change in the expression of genes associated with stress, thus the body is better equipped to handle future stress, as well as addressing the existing stress. In a study conducted by Harvard Medical School, it was determined EFT Tapping can significantly reduce stress. Tapping is non-invasive and you can do it anytime, which helps get you through the day. On the days where I wake up and feel out of sorts, I’ll jump into the shower, do some stretches, and ground myself with EFT tapping. 

We are living in overwhelming times. But human beings are made to be resilient. We have to find ways to negotiate our relationship with a disruptive society, and find ways to live within it. And it boils down to managing that stress and controlling our mind-body connection. By stimulating the meridian points on the body, you can release that stress and approach life in a more clear-headed way. 

WHAT DOES A SESSION OF EFT TAPPING LOOK LIKE?

It’s about accepting yourself, and voicing out the problem. I start by gently tapping two fingers on the brow bone, and vocalising the problem — for example, “I’m not feeling well, but I really wanted to attend a friend’s birthday dinner today. I accept myself, even if I’m not able to make it.” Then, move on to the under the cheekbones, on temples, under the collarbone, and under the ribcage. And we reach for our shoulder blades with the opposite hands, to give ourselves a big hug. Then we end with the top of the head. One of the most important parts of this practice is talking out loud. When you give a voice to the problem, you relinquish the control it has over you. Because when we bury our problems within us, we accumulate problems and eventually it gets out of control.

I also use breathwork to relax the entire system. When we’re stressed, we tend to take short, shallow breaths, but the proper way to breathe is by using your tummy. Breathe in, hold the breath for five seconds, then breath out through your mouth. It really does help to relax the entire internal system. 

I also do EFT Tapping with children, and I find that although they cry and shout, they also tend to keep their feelings deeply hidden for fear of repercussions. I have a bear with the tapping points sewn onto it so that I can guide the kids to share their feelings with the bear — because the bear can’t speak, and it’s a safe space for the children. It even works on babies — a friend tried EFT Tapping on her baby, who wouldn’t stop crying, and it released that internal stress and the child calmed down after the tapping. 

I’ve met my fair share of sceptics. People are suspicious of anything that’s holistic — they believe that the only healing they can receive is through taking a pill or seeing a doctor with a medical degree. But I always say, the only way it doesn’t work, is if you don’t do it.

PERSONALLY, WHAT IS THE BIGGEST BENEFIT OF YOUR PRACTICE?

We often avoid thinking that we’re not coping, or avoid difficult situations and difficult people. It’s only when we’re older that we learn to grapple with big emotions. We are what we think. And EFT Tapping is a go-to technique when you’re feeling overwhelmed, to tell yourself aloud that you’re doing great, and that you love yourself. It’s also an everyday thing — I always tap into gratitude. It’s so easy to wake up in the morning and say little things like, “I’m so grateful for my heating. I’m so grateful that I’ve got good neighbours.” It’s helped me with forgiveness, too. It’s a can-do technique. At the heart of it, it empowers you. It affirms you, so you can go beyond fear to become the best version of yourself. 

Joy Yaffe is based in COMO Shambhala Metropolitan London, where she incorporates EFT Tapping and breathwork to help manage anxiety, relationship issues, stress, grief, and more. To book a session with her or learn more, please click here. 

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